Alright, agreed for the first time in my life I have gone ahead and done something which is very wrong in people's eye but for once I did something which I wanted to do...Something which felt right...Something which was there at the back of my head all the time, but which never ever came to the fore...
All my life I have been making sacrifices for people, be it my parents, friends, girl friends but in all this melee I always seem to forget about one important person---"Myself".
Okay agreed I have a lot of fun in life and can't actually complain about anything in my life, but does anyone around me ever realize how I manage to keep up with all the things around myself and still keep smiling most times.
I agree with people's view that I have a short fuse and that for the last 6 months here in AIM, I had had a few short fuses already but does anyone ever ask me why is it that I react that way to situations. Nobody see's when that when I make a mistake I'll be the first one to owe upto it and apologize without any ego involved but when it comes to judging people the knives are already sharpening.
Everybody seems to be such an expert in figuring out the kind of person I am but, I just wish ask one question to those people who believe they know me inside out..."How do you know me when I myself haven't yet figured that out yet?"...
I guess in this world the moment you forget about what people thing about you and just do what's important to you, that's the moment when everything starts making sense.
I know this senseless rambling isn't making any sense right now nor will it make anytime soon, but the minute I get this thing into my head that as hard as I try to please people around me and try to be in good books of everyone, the more stress and problems I am forcing onto my own life.
The fact that all through my life I have tried to keep everyone around me comfortable has been in the end my own bane. In the end of the day I know that there are a very few people who would never judge me for the decisions I take in life nor the choices I make but will stand blindly besides me even if I am on a course to self destruction.
ps:- Chai...Chill Maddi...Thanks for at least letting me know the general feeling around.I know it's difficult for people to digest but in the end it's my life...I don't want any approvals from anyone.Just live n let live...
Not that difficult to ask for...
4 comments:
sure, I am off your case for good.
Oye, I haven't even completed the blog and you have already posted a comment...Phew that's quick...Btw the post is not targeted to anyone.Just that it's not about taking my case or judging me...anyways chill Maddi...
Dude how do you manage to do this ?? dunno wat to say but you and I have really similar thoughts...guess its being 12 & 13 for 4 yrs in a row :)
I think ppl just like judging other people, makes them feel better about themselves coz other ppl are messing up...the best thing to do is be rude to everyone or kick them and so no one can dare tell you what you are doing is wrong... ;)
Haha Bins...Yiu know I can't be rude to anyone until and unless I am really angry...Anyways yaar takes time for people yaar...Chill maadi...Till the close coterie of friends understand it's good enuf...
we can't go explaining to the whole world our actions...can we...?
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