Dead End

I have no idea how, why and when but I kind of find myself in situations where I have to decide on a issue from either point of view.

It's been a trait since I have been in college that I find friends on opposite sides with different agendas and I am the one knowing what each one is thinking about the other but powerless to intervene because at the end of the day it's not my prerogative nor issue to barge into someone else's life.

However knowing myself I can't just stand aside and see people self destruct or in most cases make a bad decision they might regret later.

All said and done, I am not saying that I am always right and that my word is the final word but then sometimes the things are so visible but still difficult to figure.

Anyways the way I look at it, it's been like this with since I was a kid, I get really frustrated when I know I don't have a control over the situation when I very well know that where is the problem...Weird isn't it?

Well now lets get to the nice part. Yesterday after struggling the whole evening to get my system to respond to FM 1, I finally gave at 12 midnight and headed to Malate with Saurabh in tow to join Aseem, Akshel and Kosy (Akshel's friend).

The place :- "Penguin" was full of energy with a live band churning out jazzy version of some nice songs all through the night.

Their cover of Enter Sandman blew my mind away and then the covers of Flintstone & Pink Panther were sweet. All in all the place was high on energy and very much like Leopold's back home though the atmosphere here was 1000 notches up than the one back in Leo's.

After the place shut down at 2 am we headed back to the campus and to Kosy's condo where we planned to drink up on screw-drivers and have some mcdonald's breakfast...Nash & Hesh also joined us there and as the night grew longer the house party grew wilder...:)

Anyways I had to retire out by 4.30 am since I have a LOB exam on Tuesday where as the rest of the fuckers have a holiday...

Curse myself for playing the nice guy again...When will I understand that "Last guys always finish last".

Well I'll still try proving the above sentence wrong.For the time being for sure...

Cheers...

A WAC on Economics...Beat that...

WAC- acronym for Written analysis of Cases.


After a week which started with the disastrous macro-economics exams which I am so gonna flunk the institute comes up another ace up their sleeve on a Friday with a WAC on Economics...*$&$%$#...

3 hrs in the afternoon from 1.30 to 4.30 pm for a case which was 10 page long with more than 10 exhibits was not a way to start a weekend or end a school week.

Anyways after crapping for 1200 words of which not even 10 made sense I finished the WAC well before time thanks to my state of mind which is really messed up.

On top of that, the impending LOB main exam which is slated for the whole of Tuesday is freezing my brain to death. 5 more quiz marks and I would have been one my way to a trip this weekend with Harsh and Akshel. Instead I'll have to struggle with LOB for today and QA and FM and MCP for the rest of the weekend before another gruesome week starts at AIM.

Man am I fed up with this life already? No time to breathe or contemplate for even a moment what am I doing, why am I doing it and for whom am I doing it?

I really hope I get through the next whole week somehow the other.
Life is turning out not the way I envisioned and I guess it's time to take stringent measures before some thing gives way.

Well for now I can feel happy that I did well in the first WAC and also our Learning team stood for each other during the meeting with prof Larry Tan...

Time to unwind and recharge the batteries for another week in AIM... :)

Walk in the rain!!!

Since the past 2 days I was having this insatiable urge of going for a jog in the rain. Today finally I was able to exercise my wish.

After the OM lecture got concluded at 11 a.m in the morning, I had a quick breakfast and then hit the road in my jogging track to enjoy the mid day heavy rain which was so similar to the one encountered back home in Mumbai.

The jog cum walk was a blissful experience with music in tow.I have no idea where I went I just followed the my mind and just started running where ever the road lead me.

This used to be my favorite past time back home. However due to the lack of physical activity as a part of my curriculum in AIM, I have been feeling a bit low for the past few days. There is nothing interesting to do here at the institute and to roam around the city I need company which is difficult because people have their own priorities plus there are the cases to be done too...

However back to jogging.I saw so many streets and their names but now when I try to recollect I can't even remember one...:)
But yeah it was fun finally venturing out near the institute and seeing first hand what all is there around AIM.

So now I know that I have a flower shop around the corner, a coffee shop which is open till late night, a pub which gives 3 beer for 100 pesos till 12 in the night and there is a pawn shop just behind the park where we plan frees-bee in the evenings.

All in all a perfect way to spend a lazy rainy day.Now I need to get ready for my HBO lecture which is scheduled in the next 35 mins. A hot shower ought to be great...

Game on...

Let the games begin...It's been two weeks since I have done anything constructive and it seems this whole week is going to be like this too.

I am so missing people back home...

Why is it that a person is never happy with his present, always aspiring for his future to come to reality today or go back to the past and redo most things.

I have been aspiring to do my MBA ever since I got out of engineering and now when I am finally doing one, it seems as if I am not making the most out of it.

Life has become so monotonous now that I don't even feel like going to classes now a days.
It's the same old voices doing cp in class and a few helpless souls like me wandering around hoping to get a hint of things from somewhere or the other so as to improve our own cp grade.

I have never been a firm believer of grade based learning and more so in an MBA where every person is inherently different with different perspectives and experiences. How can one be judged by how one does in a particular subject.What if a person doesn't know accounting or is not good with numbers or flowcharts , but is very good with people skills and leadership.
Do you just flunk a person because he can't balance an account sheet....

I agree you need minimum skills in every subject but to procrastinate someone for a single failure is unfair in my opinion.

However right now I can't be angry at the situation.
I just need to find the inspiration to get myself by the next few weeks and hope that I get my mojo back, so that I can survive the next few weeks before the most awaited break comes knocking on the door.

:) :) :)

Rambling...

She will be loved-Maroon 5...
That's what I am listening to right now...

What a beautiful song...
I know people perceive me as an extrovert, aggressive, happy go lucky guy and I am not denying that...
However there is another part of me which even I really don't know about...??? (To be discussed later...)

Btw I saw Ice Age again yesterday...And this time I memorized the 3 rules.So here it goes...

Rule no 1:- Always listen to Buck.

Rule no 2:- Always walk in the middle of the trail.

Rule no 3:- The one who leaks gas walks last... :)

Well I feel like just going to Goa right now.Just walk around on the beach of Candolim...enjoying the serene beauty the place has to offer and enjoy the sea...

I remember when back in Mumbai, I used have theses phases when I used to wake up at 5 am in the morning and drive my car all around south Mumbai and then head to Juhu beach or Rock beach around 6.30 am to enjoy the sea breeze and the energy the place provided.

those were the days when there was no responsibility on my shoulders, when all I had to worry about was when is the next match scheduled and whom I am playing...

Fast forward to the present and now I am really wondering if this is what I want. Is it all worth it...?

Separation from friends back home...? Family...?

p.s:- I really need to start controlling my anger.Went off twice yesterday...I think I should go back to my resolution...
Starts from right now...Lets see how long can I go this time...

I really don't know why I am even putting this up, but I have this urge now to just write so here it is...:)

Proactive or Reactive...

Yesterday I wrote about trade-offs and compromises.
Now I am thinking about "is it worth it?"...
Should I think like an economist and plan to save for tomorrow and consume less today (read consume for me is to have more recreation and fun)...

Should I study more, socialize less, reduce sleeping time and enjoy the MBA experience as a vagabond or should I stress myself and study as hard as I can, ace the classes and quizzes and trade-off on my personal "me" time i.e. sports, fun and friends.

Or should I take the middle path and be smart about my work as our mentor advised us during our session with him.Prioritize your work follow a schedule and come prepared to class as well as allow yourself enough free time to enjoy the MBA experience as well as the sights n beauties of this country.

Now prioritize is another new concept which is alien to me unless and until it is applied to sports...:)

For the past few days I have been in this conundrum of whether I should exert more of myself in studies and gain the most out of this classroom teaching or should I continue as always and just stay above the bell curve.

I spent 4 years of engineering telling myself that I was good enough for the course and I don't need to prove myself to anyone...I used to tell myself that I have the capability as well as the will power and intellect to beat the best when I wanted.

But that was then and I don't see myself coming out of that wave of thought even now. I am doing the same damn mistake which I did during my engineering of giving up even before trying.

So where is the dilemma?

Is it that I should work n study at my full potential or should I just rest back and wait for a shock to hit be before I react to it...

Well as of now, as I get ready to take another exam in this roller coaster of a ride called MBA in AIM ( I have my macro-Eco main paper is precisely 45 mins), I guess I'll leave the decision to react or to be pro reactive to a later date/time.

However I plan to solve this puzzle in my head with in the next few days and then not look back at it for a very long time.

I just hope I come to a decision very soon, because I don't like to be indecisive...Period...

Childhood Memories...

Just a short list of things I loved when I was a kid...

1.] The wonder years...

2.] Playing cricket all by myself in the bedroom bouncing the ball off the wall along with scoreboards and stuff...( Full 50 over matches at that)...

3.] Playing chess alone...(That's the reason I got better at the game although I still don't have the patience to play chess with someone who ponders on his/her every move)...Rapid chess rocks...

4.] Spending time on my terrace, looking at the high rises of Lokandwala every morning and evening...

5.] I loved cycling...Used to cycle during the summer vacation to the rock beaches in Versova...Bliss...

6.] Dekh Bhai Dekh...Another killer show I loved...

7.] I loved doing math when I was a kid...The reason being it was the only subject for which I was allowed to listen to music while studying.

8.] I was & am a very huge Asterix & Obelix fan.I used to take a new book from the library every week to read.Ditto with the Tintin collection.

9.] Boyzone was my favorite band while at school...

10.] I used to love walking on the streets of Lokandwala with my friends.There were so many occasions during the rainy season when I would trot off alone.

11.] Playing cricket in the colony every Sunday afternoon was a ritual which I followed till like last year.(I guess since most of my building folks are already married this recreation was bound to end).

12.] I used to love roaming around Christmas and Diwali in Lokandwala because the streets would be lighted up and decorated and there used be a buzz around the place.

13.] I regret the fact that I didn't start playing football serious when I was still at school.

14.] The highlight of my school life was when I became the house captain for my house.(It was completely unexpected since I was pitted against some very well known scholars but my little cousin sis did the publicity for me and asked the juniors to vote for me, and so I was the captain for the last yr of my school) :)...Thanks a lot Neha...

15.] I used to love watching Fun time from 12 pm to 1pm everyday during the summer vacations.

16.] I enjoyed watching Telematches on T.V and thought one day I would too compete in it...

17.] The small wonder...Viki Lawson et all...

18.] GI-Joe, tom & Jerry and He-man...Favorite animation series...

19.] I used to love watching "Lassie..." the series as well as "The Black Stallion".

20.] Loved reading the "Hardy Boys". Had a whole collection of it...